By Tammy Hill

About three weeks after our marriage, Mark was offered a teaching and coaching position at his alma mater, Wayne High School in Utah. His parents were thrilled and he was flattered. Every day brought a phone call or two from his mother encouraging us to move “home”. We knew that if he should take that position, I would not be able to finish my last year at Utah State University, which was important to me. My mother, on the other hand, was calling every day encouraging me to finish up my degree. So, we found ourselves very fresh in marriage needing to make a big decision. Until this time we had independently made our decisions.

This big decision was the first one to make together as husband and wife. We listed the pros and cons. We fasted, went to the temple for direction, and prayed for help in knowing what was best for our newly established family. Clarity in the decision was not quick to come…as is so often the case! Finally, Mark suggested that we visit with our married student ward bishop (our local clergy), Bishop Ted E. Bair. (We loved him and called him Bishop Teddy Bear!) I remember saying something like, “Mark, we don’t need to bother the bishop. He helps people with problems!” Of course, Mark was quick to point out that we did have a problem! Reluctantly, I agreed to go, and he scheduled an appointment.

When we explained our situation to Bishop Bair, he was good to counsel us with basic problem- solving skills. After our interview he asked to kneel in prayer with us. As we rose from our knees, he looked at us and said that he had received a distinct impression! We needed to read our patriarchal blessings. (These are unique and special blessings given to each individual member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, who desires to have one. We believe it is personal “scripture” revealed through the Priesthood of God.)

Nearly eighteen years later, after the recent death of Mark, I was out walking early one morning. The experience with Bishop Bair came flooding to my mind, I hadn’t thought of it in years. In that moment I knew that because we had chosen to follow the counsel from an inspired bishop, our prayers in that first big decision we made, had been answered for the benefit of our family. For seventeen years I taught both at a high school, and at a local community college. My degree had been a blessing in helping to provide for our family. But now, as a widowed single-mother, my degree could be immensely important in meeting the needs of our family. I felt calm and reassured in knowing that, if necessary, I could provide for my children in the career of my choice.

Immediately upon arriving home to our tiny, garage apartment, we got our patriarchal blessings and began to read. First Mark read his blessing. It is beautiful, but no distinct solution to our problem was found therein. Then Mark began to read my blessing. One line in my blessing says that “…the Lord will bless you in obtaining your education, and that I would be a successful classroom teacher.” Mark stopped reading. We looked at each other and both knew that I needed to finish my degree. Relief quickly came to our minds as we clearly knew that he should not accept the offer. Interestingly enough, the next day Mark was offered a teaching position at Weber High School in North Ogden, which he readily accepted. We remained in Logan, Utah another year while I finished my degree.

I am so eternally grateful for a loving Father who answered our prayers through the inspiration of a faithful bishop. For a husband who was inspired to seek counsel, and for the first process of becoming equal partners in marriage. This was the beginning of countless decisions Mark and I worked together to make for the benefit of our family.